When I made Aliyah, I thought I was prepared. I’d been on a Masa program for 10 months, had a few Hebrew phrases under my belt, and a love for chaos disguised as confidence. Spoiler alert: I wasn’t. After years of trial and error (and multiple mental breakdowns), I’ve put together the unofficial, unlicensed, but deeply accurate Olim Starter Pack. Trust me, you’re gonna need it.
1. Thick Skin
You’ll need this immediately. Israelis aren’t rude, they’re just efficient. They will yell at you, cut you in line, and offer unsolicited advice about your personal life before you’ve even said your name. It’s not personal. It’s the vibe. My madricha once told me, “Whoever’s the loudest wins the argument. And when that doesn’t work, if you’re a girl, just start crying.” And I’m here to tell you she wasn’t wrong. Develop thick skin, laugh it off, and when in doubt, raise your voice with confidence, even if you have no idea what you’re saying.
2. A Folder of Paperwork You Don’t Understand
Nothing says “new Olah” like carrying a giant envelope full of documents, hoping one of them is the right one for the fifth office you visit that day. Many papers will feel useless, and you’ll wonder when you’ll ever need them. Trust me you will. Get organized from the start. Teudat Zehut? Check. Birth certificate? Probably. Handwritten note from your third-grade Hebrew teacher? Who knows. Bring it anyway. Never throw anything away. Ever.
3. The “I Think That’s a Good Price?” Instinct
At some point, you’ll convince yourself that 30₪ for a matcha is normal. It’s not. But you’ll gaslight yourself anyway, because budgeting in Israel is part numbers, part vibes, and part letting go especially in Tel Aviv. My advice? Spend a day comparing prices at a few stores. If that doesn’t work, befriend your local vegetable man. Mine, Afraim, is a great friend and Hebrew tutor who sometimes hooks me up with a discount.
4. Israeli Apps You Didn’t Know You Needed
Your home screen is about to get a makeover. Download Moovit because Google Maps lies here, Bit: to pay friends and bills, Wolt: for food delivery heaven, MyVisit: the DMV app from hell, and Yad2: Israel’s Craigslist for secondhand everything from apartments to furniture (but less sketchy). If you have more than three apps in Hebrew, congrats you’re officially leveling up. Also, get a Spotify playlist full of Israeli artists. Hebrew music will teach you way more than any Ulpan. And no shame here… Anna Zak has taught me a lot of what I know.
5. Your Go-To “I Look Israeli” Outfit
Business casual? Don’t know her. Here, jorts are work appropriate, bras are optional, and everyone carries a linen tote or tiny crossbody. You’ll show up to an “interview” in sneakers and a wrinkled top, and no one will bat an eye. That’s probably because of the never-ending Tel Aviv summers, where dodging leaky air conditioners dripping onto sidewalks is a national sport. I call it meitzgan a mashup of mazgan (A.C.) and meitz (juice). It’s a lifestyle. Ditch the heels, embrace the sweat, and always prioritize comfort. Bonus points if you make it look effortlessly cool.
6. One Weird Food Obsession You Didn’t See Coming
Suddenly, when you’re in a rush, falafel or shwarma becomes your go-to snack. It’s fast, hot, and it slaps every time. Skip the overpriced spots and hit the little stand on King George that sells it for 9 shekels.
7. Survival Phrases in Hebrew You Actually Use
Duolingo didn’t teach me “I have an appointment but I lost my number,” so I learned that one the hard way. Your top three phrases will be:
- Yesh hanacha le’olim? (Is there a discount for new immigrants?)
- Efshar le’daber b’Anglit? (Can we speak English, please, I’m begging you?)
- Slicha, at/a yakhol la’azor li? (Excuse me, can you help me?)
Eventually, you’ll say them with confidence. Or fake it. Which is basically the same thing.
8. One Friend Who Knows What They're Doing
You need that one slightly more established friend who’s already cried at the embassy and lived to tell the tale. They’ll know what office to go to, what form you don’t actually need, and where to find peanut butter under 30 shekels. Treat them well because they’re your saving grace. And if you don’t have one, Facebook groups are gold. Israelis love their groups, and all the best resources live there.
9. A Hobby That Keeps You Sane
You need something beyond bureaucracy, stress, and existential spirals about your life choices. Whether it’s pottery, rooftop yoga, baking absurdly complicated Shabbat desserts, or aggressively journaling at a local café, find your ritual. If you want to make friends, join a run club or Pilates studio. Remember, you’re in a country full of olim, and everyone is eager to make friends.
10. Fake It Until You Make It
This is the secret sauce. The magic ingredient. You won’t understand the mail you get. You’ll nod and smile during Hebrew conversations, only catching “ken.” You’ll call your utility company and pray they don’t ask for your teudat zehut number too quickly. Then one day, you’ll actually understand those Hebrew songs you’ve been belting out for months. You’ll give directions, joke with the guy at the makolet, and realize you’re doing it.
Welcome to your new life. You’re not just surviving. You’re becoming.
